I could write endless articles of all the times that the Turtle franchise and the pizza giant were in bed together. Yeah I won’t acknowledge them by name, greedy corporate pigs go buzz off somewhere else. Shame on the Turtle franchise I thought they would be above all that, but what do I know. Did you know that these jerks made four specialty pizzas? They are suppose to be each turtles favorite marketed for the 2014 Michael “Needs More Explosions” Bay reboot. Yeah don’t believe me take a look at these below.
See what I mean? This is exactly why I cut the cord(Not to mention my cable company told me to screw off if I don’t like it). What happen to the good ole days where company exclusively advertised on television and billboards. Now they have to be in the show you’re watching and there better be a brand name drop in the show or there will be hell to pay. I predict in the future corporations are going to start handing money to suckers like me to rep a tattoo of their logo. Although I had a cool concept of maybe a tattoo of a king’s crown across my skull. Represent BK! Word!
Maybe I’m being a little unfair to poor pizza giant. After all Activision or Infinity Ward? EA? Whoever the hell makes Call of Duty has perfected the art of marketing. What does every stereotypical gamer enjoy? Soda, Chips and anything that be thrown into the microwave and in 1 to 2 minutes you got yourself a snack you no good lowlife still living with your parents at home(I may of exaggerated a little there but who knows?). Thanks game developers, because of you all non-gamers think that all gamers are lazy slugs that can’t be bothered to put down the controller and cook a decent meal. I’m not totally helpless!
Alright that’s enough for one day but don’t get comfortable yet pizza giant I still got more coming your way. In retrospect I can’t fault the TMNT franchise for taking the money and run (Steve Miller Band song reference) with it, I would of done the same. That reminds me I need to spend the rest of my day kissing up to the same corporations on their Facebook page. Think they’d respond to me? Nah, who am I kidding they have a pocket of them but won’t give me one. Oh and by the way, yes I just embedded a Steve Miller Band song. Why? Because its awesome that’s why. Until next time I’m out.